The Lad Formerly Known As..

My First Husband.

What I am going to do when I publish is keep it simple, just for ease of putting it all together. So the format will be pretty easy, I think. I will keep the text all black for the most part, but I will put a ----------- line in between each email. My text is centred, his text is left justified. When other characters come in, I will make them a different colour. Narratives will be in bold maroon text. I may highlight text that is funny or important in italics or bold.

And now, his first pics to me. :)

Sweety Moon ,

Baby angel , pls forgive your baby boy for not sending the pics on time , my Boss came in and he requested I go to the nearest Station to get some files against tomorrows auditting at the workshop .

Here are my current pics as you have requested , baby , I felt good and the cool vanished after I viewd your naked pics , hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, just laughing in here . the pics is really crazy baby girl , I really love it and will keep on loving you . hope you find these pics good . still your baby boy honey , ever and always loving you . as for the FRO HAIR GROW , I can if you really mean it , I will do whatever you request just to make sure you are happy my baby .

Will write more to you soon baby angel .

Well, this is my very first bait, and he's not a looker. :( I don't really care, he's on the hook, that's all that matters.

Sweet Heart ,

Pls do get back to me . I dreamt about you last night , it was really a good coming dream concerning our marriage . well, I have always had it in mind that , you and I are going to live forever . That was exactly the stuff of my dream last night , I couldn't sleep very well last night because all of my thoughts were rising on your absence . honey , I can no longer wait to seing you , I mean I am in haste to see you . your pics are quite more attractive and they are all beautiful . I can not wait any longer to kiss that beautiful angel of my life which is you , pls darling , I don't want anything to border you and I want you to recover from the soar throat quickly so that you can sing to me .

I love to watch you singing . Is it possible for me to fly down to Australia to watch you love ? I wanna fly down there if you confirm it possible . pls do get back to me . here is the last 6th pic of yesterday . I couldn't complete them coz my scanner was giving me problems . I had to do it this morning . I will call you later on today when I get to my office . I have re-sent my home address to Taryn . so she can instruct DHL to carry on the delivery to my home address which I funished her yesterday .

Sweet love , I am greatly missing you in here . I am all alone and you can immagine what I am into . feeling you always . pls send me a first class Ticket to meet you immediately in Australia . How about GUY and Sienna ? Hope they are all doing well . pls my kindest regards to them .

Everly Yours Husband ,

Christopher .

Okie dokie then, but to come to Australia, he will need a visa. And I sure ain't paying for it. I see a chance here to involve one of the other audio baiters, The Failure, as my boss. And get some forms filled in. Why not the real thing? I go to the Australian Immigration website and download the visa forms. And, I decide to start name calling.. :) heh this could be fun.

Sun Baby,

Of course! What a fantastic idea. I am cc'ing this to Taryn, so I can instruct her to sort this out right away.

Taryn, I want you to go to the Travel Agent, and organise this immediately. I would like my heat pump Christopher to arrive in Australia as soon as possible for I am cold but I realise it may be a problem to get tickets for straight away. Can you please check the dates and get back to us with the informations as to when he can travel to love me.

I send this now - Christopher, can you get back to Taryn with the earliest date you could leave Nigeria, and the nearest international airport name? Taryn, I believe Qantas fly direct from J'berg to Sydney, which will work out great, as we are there most of next week.

Christopher, do you have a passport? Can you get a visa to Australia on this short notice? Do you need one? What is your full name so the tickets can be booked correctly, and your home address so we can courier the tickets to you?

We have arrived in Brisbane if either of you need to call me I am available on the mobile, but give me an hour to have some dinner as we missed out on the Gold Coast.

Thanks guys! I am so excited!
Anukah

Baby Angel ,

I knew you were gonna get interested to send me an urgent ticket to Australia . I supposed to have notified you about my coming to meet you in Australia but because my mother was afraid when I told her I am going to Australia for my safety . I told her I trusted you so much , informing about my marying you , she was shocked to hear that I am going to marry you so quickly . she was excited and she said I should go on with you if I have trusted you . so there is not going to be any problem as my mother has accepted my travelling to meet you in Australia .

I have written Taryn to be quick i the booking . I told her to send me the ticket Via my home address .

To answer your questions , yes I have a passport . But I am going to have problem getting a quick Visa to Australia . so pls help me out on this respect . I need Visa from you ls darling , I just can not wait to meet with you , I am almost getting crazy here thinking about you , pls let both the Travel Agent and Taryn hurry up and sort out the Ticket issue .

Let me know what to do about my Visa and what you ae doing to it so that I get a quick Visa to fly down there and meet my baby Angel . I am going to leave Nigeia immediately the Tcket and Visa is confirmed to me . I will follow British Airways , it's beter and from there I will connect straight to Australia or what do you suggest ? coz Qantas does not exist here in Lagos Nigeria .

Here is my home address again , pls get me there quicly honey , remember you are the love of my life , everything I do here without you is ot right . I am waiting for your next update .

Everly Yours Husband,
Christopher Chiguzo Ibezimako .
Thats my full name on my passport .

What? No Qantas? But that is the safest airline in the world! After the KLM saga, I am understandably concerned. Believe me, this issue will be revisted later! But first we need a visa.

Sun Statue of Love,

Ok, I have quickly checked with Guy, and he says to get the visa, I will need a copy of your passport, and he will sponsor you to come here as I cannot do it - I am not Australian! It would be ok if it was America, I could do that easily, but here someone who is Australian needs to sponsor you.

Here's the plan. You send me the passport scan, and tomorrow I will send one of the secretaries from the tour to the visa office to see exactly what we need. We have a show tomorrow so very limited amount of time, but if the secretary does the running around and gets everything we need, Guy and I will be able to run down to the visa office after we finish our interviews for the day.

Can you scan it right away? We are checking the website to see if there are any forms that need to be filled in. I will email if we find them. I send this now and more soon,
Your Baby Girl.

Sun Statue of Love,

I got your email . I like the Plan , it's very good . That means , I have to get my Passport scaned to you in the next 2 hours from now coz it's with my Uncle who stays in the nearest city .

I will send it ASAP . pls do not forget to review my kindest greetings to GUY . Tell him I like him and that he is quite a good friend . when I meet you in Australia , I will have to Fly to America with you where we have our blessed home forever . I and Anukah forever . my sweet baby girl , I thank you for everything you have done for me , I really apprecaite them , do you not worry , God is with us , If God is with us , who can be against us ? absolutely no body . I love you so much and my heart is filled with joy everyday when I remember you .

I will write you when I come back from going to get my passport .

Yours Baby Boy,
Christopher .

Hi baby,

I was trying to sleep but I am so excited about you coming here, and also your pics. I have to tell you what I think of them. Parts of me are tingling just looking at them.

You look so strong and tall, and you have such big feet! What size are your feet so I can make sure to have some special shoes for you when you get here?

When I was a little girl, I used to have a Ken doll, and I used to like to take the clothes off my ken doll to see what is underneath. You remind me of the Ken doll. I just want to make you naked and then lick you all over with my tounge, like I used to do to my Ken doll. Will this be ok with you?

I know it is going to be a very busy time for us and hope you will be with me here in person soon, but if you do have any time to send me some photos with less clothes on and more smiling, it would make me very happy! :)

It is customary in my family that before we can be married we must know each other's bodies very well. I would like to start to learn yours before you get here, because I know I am going to be so busy touching it and licking it that I might not have time to know it with my eyes very well. and please, I must have pictures of your bare feet too!

I will send you another naked pic so you can know my body better. And what would a day be without another fro pic? Im not sure what the photog thought he was going to get a picture of from that angle..

Guy was wearing the sunglasses today because the two of us stayed up *all* night last night talking, writing and rubbing each other's feet after our concert shoes were very painful. So I really need to try and get some sleep tonight. He's out like a light.. Oh! sleep pics! Ill go take them now.. :) hehe oh darn it no camera bateries. I'll have to go to a shop. That's too hard :(

You're very handsome my Greek God Statue.
With Lust in my heart,
Anukah

Sweet Angel ,

Here is my Passport . Pls kindly proccess our coming to meet you immediately . I will like to come with my uncle because I am not familiar with Australia . And he is an Athlete and he travels a lot . that means you would have to instruct Taryn to arrange for two tickets to Australia . I really want to be with you soonest . I have already discussed with my family and they are also earger to meet with you after we acquint ourselves in Australia . To this regards, they have decided that my should accompany me to meet with you in Australia and from there he will go back to Nigeria while I fly down to the states with you .

It has been so exciting seing your half nude photographs , I can not wait to feel them like you have never been felt before . Really , you have made my life to be incomplete without talking to you daily .

Yours Baby Boy,

Christopher .

Two excellent fakes - so real looking that my mentor Fungus called in the experts to see if these were real. The end conclusion was that these are fake. I don't know how they thought they would get into Australia with them!

Dear Anukah,
CC: Christopher

I have been to the travel agent. They advise me of the following.

There is a direct flight from Lagos, Nigeria, to Johannesburg South Africa on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.
10:15pm
    5:10am+1
     SA <http://www.flysaa.com> 0061
     744 <http://www.quicktrip.com/flightbase/schedules/HTML_Schedules.asp?Title=#>
    X246
     0
    5:55 hrs

Christopher would catch that flight, and then would catch this flight the same morning he arrives at Joburg
10:35am
    3:30pm
     QF <http://www.qantas.com> 0063
     744 <http://www.quicktrip.com/flightbase/schedules/HTML_Schedules.asp?Title=#>
    357
     0
    13:55 hrs.

He would need to apply for a visa - he has to fill in the attached form. and provide a copy of his passport. The easiest way is for you to lodge the application in Australia, they can approve it very quickly

*******************************************************************
*CHRISTOPHER THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. READ CAREFULLY.
*You must fill out the form thoroughly and truthfully. Print it out, fill it in, and scan it, return it to Anukah ASAP.

The faster we can do this, the faster we can get you to Anukah.

*Anukah*, please see the other email I have sent you re BMG's feelings on this idea. They do not seem to be happy. You need to call Ian Dickson to get his approval for a visitor on the tour.

I hope it all works out well, and I wait for further instructions.

Taryn

Dear Taryn ,

Thank you very much for your kind update . However , I have already sent my passport to Anukah . She will get back to me on what I need to do next . Meanwhile , I will fill the forms immediately . pls tell me , do I need to send the forms back to Australian Embassy ? Or should I send it to you ? Where exactly and how do I send it to them ? by Fax or Email scan ? Or would Anukah get the Visa for me from Australia ? pls clarify me urgently . I will have them properly filled within the nest 10 minutes from now .

I am waiting for your quick reply .
Yours Sincerely ,
Christopher Chiguzo Ibezimako.

Dear Christopher,

You need to scan the filled in forms and send them to Anukah, so that she can get the visa from Australia. As Guy is sponsoring you, you need to fill in that form truthfully and honestly. Make sure you fill them in completely so she can organise it tomorrow.

I do not need to tell you what kind of heads would roll if Guy Sebastian, the Australian Idol were to do something even mildly dodgy, so be aware these forms will be seen by the legal people at BMG before he is allowed to file them.

If you have any kind of untruths on that form, you will be stopped at Australian Customs, and not allowed to enter the country, so be wise when you fill it in.

Taryn

Dear Taryn ,

Thank you very much for your guidelines . I appreciate them all . I am going to do as instructed right away . I have properly filled them up and will carefully scan them to my Love tomorrow morning . my scanner has some little problems at the moment and will not be able to scan it now , but by tomorrow morning , I will get them scaned to Anukah my Wife .

Again , thank you very much for your kind assistance . If I encounter any problem scanning them , I will let you know the next proccess .

Yours Sincerely,
Christopher .

I got the passports but not the visa forms! How am I to get you the Visa if I do not have the forms? :(

Anukah

Dearest Wife ,

I have filled the forms and I am just waiting for my computer engineer to arrive so that he opens my scanner lock to enable me scan the forms to you . I am sending the two forms , my own and my uncle's own too because my family has said he accompanies me to meet with you . My mother has urged him to follow me and know you so that he can come back home with good news that they have known my wife , hahahahaha, these family of mine are very caring and funny . So pls , in less than 2 hours from now , I will scan them so that you get the Visas to two of us .

What about the arrangement on the tickets honey ? Has Taryn been able to do anything regarding that ? or does your Travel Agent need to buy the tickets with our Visas ? Pls let me know because I have filled two weeks in the form to visit Australia . How is my good friend GUY SEBASTIAN ? I quess he must be asleep by now . I will call you sooner I get the forms sent to you .

Everly Yours Husband ,

Christopher .

His good friend, huh? This inspires me to bring Guy himself into the bait. But first another itinerary! and some pics, because there hasn't been enough Guy in this bait yet.

Dear Christopher,

Here are days 10 -12 for you, I have also included some photographs from the presspack for you of both Guy and Anukah as I thought you would like them. With the presspack, there are 2 Guy shots, 2 Anukah shots, and three of them together.

Regards,
Taryn

Friday November 19 - Day Ten
7am NSW time
Breakfast - Tour staff, Style Team, Guy, Anukah.
7:30am NSW time
Hair and Makeup - Style Team, Guy, Anukah
8am NSW time
Transfer to Sydney via tour bus - Travel time 1h30.
11am NSW time
Tour bus takes all tour staff to Wonderland for the day.
Guy & Anukah to perform on main stage at 1pm NSW time.
Photo Shoot candid during day.
5pm NSW time
Dinner. BMG Australia headquarters. Working, no M&G.
7pm NSW time
Travel to Canberra

FOURTH TOUR SHOW - SATURDAY NOVEMBER 20 - DAY ELEVEN
**PLEASE NOTE ROUTINE FOR SHOW DATES IS ALWAYS IDENTICAL**
**SAME SHIT, DIFFERENT DAY, NEW LOCATION, BY ORDER IAN 'DICKO' DICKSON BMG AUSTRALIA**

7am NSW time
Breakfast. Guy, Anukah.
7:30am NSW time
Hair and Make Up. Style Team, Guy, Anukah.
8am NSW time
Transport to Radio & TV Interviews, Guy, Anukah
12pm NSW time
Transport to Show Venue - Canberra, Royal Theatre
Lunch on site - Crockett Catering.
1pm NSW time
Sound Checks - Anukah, Guy.
3pm NSW time
"Fro Zone" - Anukah, Guy.
5pm NSW time
Dinner, on site, Crockett Catering.
6pm NSW time
Tour Team Meeting - All staff, Guy, Anukah, Tony Bonaducci Dancers
7pm NSW time
Tour prayer "You Raise Me Up" - to be sung by all in huddle formation
Warm Up.
7:30pm NSW time
Anukah on Stage
8pm NSW time
Guy on Stage
Anukah Physio and Massage
10pm NSW time
Guy Physio and Massage
10:30pm NSW time
Transport back to Accommodation

Tuesday November 21 - Day Twelve
7am NSW time
Breakfast - Tour staff, Style Team, Guy, Anukah.
7:30am NSW time
Hair and Makeup - Style Team, Guy, Anukah
8am NSW time
Travel to Sydney via tour bus - Travel time 3hrs.
Check in to hotel.
12pm NSW time
Lunch at Hotel - Anukah, Guy
1pm NSW time
Start shoot for Anukah's video "Butterfly" - Anukah
6pm NSW time
Return to hotel. Dinner.
Accomodation
Star City
2br Suite.

Hmm, is it getting warm in here? :) Looking at too many Guy pics inspires the next email..

To my Caspian Theatre Statue,

veeeeeeeeeeery tired. plane was late, plane was so cold that Guy and I huddled together for warmth. He's very warm. :) and so sweet, he makes up for you not being here. He's turned the heat on full in here because we were so cold, which is making me sleeeepy, but not any warmer, I might have to go and huddle some more.

But I didn't want a day to go by without me sending you a pic of me. I have a Guy pic - thats MY laptop! and a me and Guy pic today! But be warned, it's a very strange hair day for me in this picture. So far, we have been in Australia nine days, and I have worn 23 wigs for different photo shoots and then there is the concert hair styling, it is killing my hair.

They did the curly Beyonce look for me that day - it was our gold coast concert, one of the photogs gave it to me but it still has his tag on it, I'm sorry :( Do you know Beyonce? and check my shoes. I should kill Sienna for making me wear them..

I'm gonna go curl up with Guy now, I'm freezing. Be good baby! I wait for the visa forms before I can do anything else now..

Nukah

Well that is me exhausted for today, just a short page this time.

Time for a new page.. click here. And my, what fun this page has been!

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